I just can't understand all this stuff. I mean I understand the obsessive toxicity of power. I understand how people surrounded by people who believe the same theory of the world can gradually be sucked into the rationalizations and the desire to solve everything "later" after this one last dilemma is avoided.
I understand how some men become monsters because of the way they are raised and the sequence of experiences that let them get away with wrong, abusive, illegal acts. They say that what finally gives serial killers away is that with each murder they become more convinced that they are smarter than everyone else -- so they come a little more out in the open, a little less careful. But Trump is not so conniving -- he's just in fantasy, free of reality. It's Barr who is fantasizing.
At the moment I'm seeing a tweet that the livestream video monitoring of the hearing of Barr has been closed down by hate speech. Very convenient for a man who is involuntarily exhibiting "tells" of lying and arrogance. What happened to simply editing the hate speech? No one in the hearing room is cursing, shouting, or making false accusations, at least in the short intervals I've been able to tolerate. YouTube says they have a team that can filter hate speech. But such excessive propriety is just a shield, a rationality in a world where everyone watches obscene media.
I can understand that many of these people -- I can't quite say "old white patriarchal men" because there are exceptions -- have made careers of roles that were supposed to be responsively representative rather than permanent, and thereby have committed themselves to staying in office though it means spending their time on campaigning and raising money rather than examining issues and framing legislation.
I understand that many of these people relate to a world that no longer exists, that was largely invented after WWII and that relates only to English speakers with empire in their guts. (It's what they eat.) I understand that the assumption that somewhere there is a God or Hero who holds the key to the future and that commitment to that individual is necessary. I understand that in these contexts it's very easy to slip into debt so vast that it makes being bought-out necessary along with the fantasy that it can be kept secret. I even understand the world created by the conceit that a major business can be a "person," an incorporation in the way of Jesus being a corpus representing God, and can use those privileges and protections to dominate nations.
I understand the narrative thread about the international Mafia, where it came from, but have no grasp on where it thinks it is going. What can one do with billions and billions of monetary units, not necessarily dollars? Build a building that looks so much like a "quim" that some people find it embarrassing to talk about? (Evidently not the ones who celebrate the depiction of private parts as a breakthrough for freedom.) It's clear that Mafia participants do not have the option to leave. Also, that it takes extraordinary effort to get rid of such a deeply embedded international network, like the new worldwide fungus, Candida Auris, that is immune to antibiotics.
In such a case, only the basic health and strength of the whole body can save it. I'm not sure we have that. I'm not sure cyber-connections are allies of us or our afflictions. Probably both.
I don't understand the Republicans. Looking haunted, they do things that they KNOW will catch up with them and probably invite terrible retribution someday. They will directly contradict themselves for mysterious reasons. The phrase "selling one's soul" comes to mind. The exception is McConnell, who seems to think politics is all binary winning, an eternal football game, concussions irrelevant. No collaboration allowed. In other words, not real.
I don't understand the people who refuse to have anything to do with politics because they don't believe it's real -- just a depiction of something naturally excremental. They feel it is contaminating and irrelevant -- to be kept secret until it can be flushed away.
I'll keep paying attention because what choice do I have? Maybe a contagious cloud will lift.